I Used to Hope for a Savior — But I Realized the Savior Is Me
Let me take you back.
At 15, I wasn’t paying rent — but I knew if I wanted extras, like cute clothes or weekends with my friends, I had to earn my own money. I came from a loving family, but we were lower middle-income. Hard work was expected. I went to college. I had grit and ambition and a fierce drive to build something meaningful.
At 22, I married a driven man. For 23 years, we grew a business, raised a family, and built a life. I kept one foot in my own career the entire time — but I handed off the financial power to him. Not because I couldn’t handle it, but because, back then, money scared me. It felt intimidating, complicated, like something I just didn’t understand. He was confident with it — and I told myself that was enough.
Then we divorced. In 2013, everything shifted. And I had to face life on my own — financially, emotionally, and in every sense of the word.
The Climb After the Fall
For the past 12 years, I’ve been climbing, clawing, rebuilding. Thriving in many ways — but terrified in others. I built a solid career. I earn a growing and solid salary. On paper, things look strong.
But here’s the truth no one tells you:
A good salary isn’t enough to build real freedom.
I avoided budgeting.
I didn’t look at my accounts.
I felt shame that I didn’t know more about investing.
I carried a fear of facing my finances, even though I was “successful.”
And that fear? It’s the exact thing that keeps so many strong, capable women stuck.
Because financial freedom isn’t about making more money — it’s about owning your money.
And that’s the shift I’m making now.
Why I Stopped Waiting and Started Leading Myself
For a long time, I hoped someone would step in and make things easier — a financial advisor, a new partner, the universe. But I realized:
I am the only one who’s never left me. I’ve been here the whole time.
And that woman? She’s scrappy, smart, and done waiting.
Being your own savior doesn’t mean doing it all alone. It means you stop outsourcing your power. You stop waiting for a lifeboat and realize you’ve had the damn oars the whole time.
The Real Work of Reclaiming Financial Power
Here’s what it’s looked like for me — and what might help you, too:
💸 1. Facing the Numbers Without Shame
I stopped hiding. I logged in. I looked at my debt, my savings, my retirement accounts. I got clear. And I reminded myself: Information isn’t judgment. It’s power.
Try this:
- Track your spending for one month with no judgment.
- Use a simple app or spreadsheet to understand your flow.
📈 2. Learning the Basics of Investing (Even if it Feels Late)
I used to think I was too old or too far behind. But I’m 57 — and I now invest monthly in a Roth IRA, a brokerage account, and even a forex trading plan. I’m learning in real time and showing my daughters how to do the same.
Try this:
- Open a Roth IRA (you can start with as little as $50).
- Watch YouTube videos, read beginner blogs, or take a course designed for women.
- See some of my favorite teachers that help me below.
💰 3. Creating Income Streams Beyond the 9-5
I’ve started building digital content platforms. I’m exploring affiliate marketing and passive income. I have some side hustles to increase funds available for trading and investing. I’m not just earning — I’m diversifying.
Try this:
- Brainstorm ways to turn your skills or story into income.
- Could you teach, consult, write, sell, or share what you know?
🔐 4. Building Safety Before Risk
I am growing my emergency fund. I use a high yield savings account through Betterment.com, and it helps me breathe easier. I don’t swipe credit anymore. I’m focused on security first, then expansion.
Try this:
- Set a goal for $1,000, then $5,000 in a high-yield savings account.
- Automate $50/month if that’s all you can start with.
- Consistency is key. Pay yourself!
🧠 5. Adopting a New Money Mindset
This is the biggest one. I now believe:
- I can learn this.
- I deserve stability.
- It’s never too late to be powerful with money.
And I’m showing up every day to prove it true.
To the Woman Reading This…
You may not have grown up wealthy.
You may have given away your financial power in a marriage.
You may feel ashamed that you’ve “waited this long” to start.
But you are not behind.
You are not too late.
And you are absolutely not broken.
You are smart, resilient, and still rising.
You are the plan. You are the power.
And this next chapter?
It’s going to blow your own damn mind. 💥
Need a Place to Start? Here’s a Simple Plan:
✅ Look at your bank account this week — no judgment, just clarity
✅ Pick one money goal for this month: save $100, open an IRA, or track your spending
✅ Talk to a friend about money — normalize the conversation
✅ Bookmark this post. Come back when fear creeps in.
✅ Say this out loud: “I’m the woman who is building her own safety, freedom, and joy.”
If this resonated, share it with a woman who needs it.
And come find me at www.lovemiddlelife.com — a place where we rise together.
You’re not done yet.
You’re just getting started.
📚 My Favorite Teachers & Tools Helping Me Rise
One of the most empowering things I’ve done in midlife is let go of the belief that I had to figure everything out alone. The truth is, there are incredible people and platforms out there making money make sense — especially for women like us.
Here are the guides and tools I personally use and love:
💻 Forex for Women
I’m learning how to trade using a clear, woman-centered strategy built on consistent wins, compounding, and smart risk. It’s not about getting rich overnight — it’s about building confidence and daily cash flow over time.
👉 This is where I’m building a plan for real financial freedom through trading.
🧠 Call to Leap with Steve Chen
Steve teaches long-term investing with clarity and calm. His no-fluff, step-by-step approach has helped me understand how to grow wealth in a way that actually feels doable.
👉 Great if you want to stop guessing and start building your investment plan with intention.
🎧 Jean Chatzky
Jean’s been a trusted voice in women’s financial wellness for decades. Her podcast and practical tips cover everything from budgeting to retirement with warmth, humor, and a deep understanding of the emotional side of money.
👉 She makes you feel seen and smarter — all in the same breath.
🗂️ That Budget Babe
Her planner has changed the game for me. It’s simple, beautiful, and totally doable. For years, I avoided budgeting out of fear — now I actually look forward to sitting down with her system each week.
👉 If you want to track your money without overwhelm, this is the tool to try.
💰 Betterment
I use Betterment for my high-yield savings account — and I love how easy it is. I can set up auto-deposits, name my goals (like “Emergency Fund” or “Travel with My Daughters”), and watch it grow with more interest than a traditional bank.
👉 A super smart place to park your short-term cash.
🌱 Vanguard
Vanguard is where I opened my Roth IRA, and I also use it for long-term stock investing. Their platform is simple, trusted, and perfect for anyone getting started without a financial advisor.
👉 If you want to invest for retirement or build long-term wealth, start here.
Why This Matters
Because knowledge is power — but action is freedom.
These teachers and tools have helped me break through fear, confusion, and shame around money. I’m still learning every day. But I’m not stuck anymore. And I don’t want you to be either.
There’s no magic formula.
There’s just commitment, clarity, and showing up — again and again — until confidence becomes your new normal.
Here’s a DOWNLOADABLE cheat sheet with my favorite take-your-head-out-of-the-sand resources!